Signs You Bought a Bad
Christmas Tree

- 10 -
Two feet tall, forty feet wide
- 9 -
Salesman's opening line: "You're not a cop, are you?"
- 8 -
It looks suspiciously like a broom handle with a lot of coat hangers
- 7 -
While you sleep, it gets liquored up and takes the family caravan for a joy ride.
- 6 -
Each branch has "Duraflame" printed on it.
- 5 -
Keeps heckling your lame top ten list
- 4 -
It's very small and says "air freshener" on it.
- 3 -
Rabbis have better Christmas trees than yours.
- 2 -
Some guy named Mujibur puts a crappy Statue of Liberty on top of it
- 1 -
Constantly bragging about its "trunk size"

(Source: Top Ten Lists from LATE SHOW with DAVID LETTERMAN)


Greg's CHRISTMAS Pages
Copyright © Greg Brother 2000-2001. All rights reserved.
http://www.kraftmstr.com/christmas/index.html